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Page 1 of 2 Resisting harmful peer group pressure
Preparation for correct decisions
Every single human being feels the need to belong to a group and in the child this craving is particularly acute. It is put under severe test when the child is under harmful pressure from its peers to take psychotic drugs, drink, smoke and experiment with sex. There are also various other ways in which this pressure may be applied, such as indulging in destructive mischief, shop lifting or cheating in school or college examinations. It is part of the child's growing up process to meet these tests, but it is the responsibility of parents to prepare the child to recognize, understand, and deal with harmful peer group pressures. Parents should never underestimate the force of peer group pressure but should remember that even in their own cases they are concerned with the opinions of their social circles and are reluctant to be left out by acting against their peer group pressures. Besides, the child has not their experience in dealing with this type of a problem and merely saying Don’t is not a helpful attitude. The first step is to teach the child to recognize peer group pressures. You may do this by adopting this approach.
“I know there will be times when your friends will want you do something you know is wrong, and you will find it hard to say “No” because you don’t want to be the only one left out, or you don’t want to appear a ‘Goody–goody’. Maybe you will be afraid that if you say ‘No’ they won’t accept you or be your friends any more. Or may be you will think they will tease you and spread rumors about you in the school. This is called peer group pressure and most kids are subjected to it sometime or another. You can also feel the pressure when you are the only one who wants to do something, but you feel silly doing it because no one else wants to. We adults also experience peer group pressure and it is something we all have to learn to cope with”.
The next step is to win the child’s confidence by getting him or her to discuss situations where peer group pressure was applied. Explaining instances of your own case of peer group pressure will show the child that the problem is not unique to him or her, and is part of continuous character formation. It will also convince the child that your attitude is helpful and not censorious. It is very important that the child is given complete information on the harmful consequences of what peer groups will induce him or her to do BEFORE the exposure to the pressure occurs. The kind of facts to be known are the dangerous effects of psychotic drugs, the legal penalties attached to their use, the danger of mixing drugs and alcohol, how judgment and coordination can be impaired by drinking alcohol, and using drugs, the ease with which drugs and alcohol break down barriers of restraint and lead to free indulgence in sex, how sexual excitement can escalate and become difficult to control, the possibilities of contracting sexual diseases including AIDS, and of the female becoming pregnant. In fact, the more you talk with your child, and give him or her complete information and anticipate the many situations and feelings that may be involved, the less is the child likely to be pressurized into unhealthy or dangerous decisions.
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